I have always been the “odd one out”. Never a #PerfectFit. As a kid, I don’t remember owning any dolls. As a teenager, when my classmates talked about bras and boys, I had my head dug into a book. In college, I was the least glamorous one found mostly in the library or the hostel room. I wanted to wear a salwar-kameez in my wedding ceremony. No, I am not crazy or looking for any attention by doing things differently. And there was a time when I tried frantically to adhere to the expectations. But I just don’t fit into “roles” easily. Not even now.
I am a mommy to a super-energetic 7 year old and I behave like anyone but a typical “mommy”. Somedays I am an equally energetic and uncontrollable “35 year old kid” who is dancing like a maniac with my son. On other days, I am as inquisitive as my 7 year old about a battery operated helicopter. When other mommies are gossiping about the latest neighbor, I am out there on the ground scoring another goal. School fancy dress competitions are a chance for parents to bring out their creative best. For me, they are a nightmare. I always think why crumpled uniforms cannot be considered as “costumes” . (Did you just call me lazy?) I always make deals with my son. “If you watch a movie with me today, I will come with you to the gaming zone next week”. I negotiate really hard with him over that last piece of brownie. You will sometimes find me pocketing chocolates from my son’s stock. I am not evil so I will make sure that the stock is replenished immediately but the chocolate greed always wins over the mommy guilt.
No matter how hard I try, I cannot be the “ideal” #PerfectFit mommy. And I guess my son likes that. At least for now. His perception and expectations might change when he meets his friends’ picture perfect moms. That, however, will not change anything for me. He might or might not understand the inherent craziness that his mom possesses but I am sure that a wonderful and compassionate individual like him will say, “its ok if you don’t fit right Mom, I want you to ‘B You’.” But till then he is stuck with me. I know, that’s so mean. But I am an ill-fitting mommy, remember.
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